I don’t know whether it is because I’ve had a good sleep, or a trip out, or Freyja’s just being fabulous, but I feel bloody good today. Yesterday was horrendous for me. I felt like a completely evil person who was crap at being a mum. Freyja was playing up (she’s a toddler, I know it’s normal) but my patience level had plummeted, and instead of dealing with things calmly, I’d shout. I annoyed myself. I cried and felt like absolute poo.
Today however, I feel good. I feel good about myself. I feel good about Freyja. I feel as though I’m being a good mum. I’ve been able to diffuse wobblers without having a wobbler of my own, and Freyja’s actually listened to me.
We went out this morning to meet up with some friends for a brew in Debenhams, and I have to say I was dreading it a bit. Not because of the people. They are fabulous. But because usually, Freyja can’t sit still, is into everything, lashes out, won’t share, has lots of strops and usually makes a scene in the middle of the shop floor. She didn’t. She was perfect. She shared her toys. She shared her Wotsits. Yeah, she drank everyones juice, but at least she shared hers. She put her coat on when I asked her to, and kept hold of my hand when leaving. I was so proud. To the point where, just as I was picking her up into her car seat, I said “Thank You” and gave her a big kiss.
I feel like a different person than I did yesterday. I feel awesome! Squee!