Metal Mummy

I’m following my Peppa Pig rant up with a bit of a summary of what I’ve been up to over the past couple of months. You know, just in case anyone is feeling particularly nosey about why I’ve not had chance to breathe…

- I now work Full Time. I’m the assistant manager at the pub I work at. I have achieved my personal license certificate. I have attained a CRB check (twice, because the last one expired). I have had pictures taken that make me look like I have one eye bigger than the other (they also show my wonderful bags that I struggle to hide after a long week at work). I have sent off the application (which is currently being returned back to me because they want original documents and the occupation of the person who endorsed the photo. You don’t need that for a bloody passport!…)

- Working full time gives me 3 evenings, 2 days and a 14 hour shift, equating to 40 hours work. Daughter dear goes off to the fantabulous childminder (who I swear Freyja loves more than me) every Tuesday. I’m happy to report that this is still fandabidozy, no problems have occurred and Freyja has a whale of a time.

- I’m also PLANNING MY WEDDING. After a very spontaneous booking of a venue when James was sat pissed up in the middle of a mucky field at a festival, it’s finally happening. OK, so James didn’t know about it when I booked it, and he still hasn’t seen the venue, but it’s finally happening. May 31st next year. And what a bargain we got! I will go into more detail when I’m not trying to summarise things.

- As part of the wedding plans, I have decided to make all of our stationery, which you can imagine is rather time consuming. These are now done, after taking a month to complete, but they look fabulous and I’m really chuffed with the outcome. Again, this was something that took away all my time.

- My daughter has a new obsession with Tangled. I kinda like it too, and has engrossed many an afternoon. In turn, this has distracted me from the likes of my blog and Twitter. I want Maximus the horse.

- I am still helping with BDT, writing when I can and helping to upload stuff each month.

In Freyja news….

- She’s potty trained. She still sleeps with a nappy, but during the day, she has no nappies at all. The process took 5 days from start to finish, and I had nothing to do with it. She went over to France in July in nappies and came back in pants. A hell of a lot easier than I expected.

- Her new favourite words are “Why?” and “Need”. “Why mummy? Why?” she says. “Because I said so”, I say. “Mummy, I neeeeeeeeeeed a biscuit…. I neeeeeeeeed Tangled.” Yeah kid, sure you do.

- She can count to 10. Sometimes she skips straight to eleven instead of seven but she’s almost there.

- She can sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and bloody hell, it’s like well cute.

- She knows who are boys and who are girls. Don’t ask me how.

- She knows that she has blue eyes, I have brown eyes and daddy has brown eyes. She also knows that nanna has blue eyes even though she hadn’t seen her for a while.

- She likes to get naked and has many a time been spotted playing in the sand pit in the nuddie. She possibly gets sand in her unmentionables, but hasn’t complained so far.

In Kali news…

- She’s huge. Grown a heap since I last posted anything about her.

- She’s getting there with her training. She will sit and stay and occasionally retrieve.

- She can swim.

- She poos a lot.

- She chews a lot.

- She has an unhealthy interest in armpits, feet and cleavage.

- She thinks she’s a boy and humps your leg.

Wedding News (8 months to go) …

- Stationery is made. Invites are awesome. With wax seals and everything.

- Dress is bought. A designer number, originally £1300 but got it off eBay for £500. Bargain, or what!

- Shoes are bought. Another bargain.

- Photo Album and Guest Book are bought. Also, bargains.

- Cake stand bought. You guessed it, a bargain.

What we’ve been up to – not as exhaustive a list as I expected, my memory is shit…

- Trips to the woods for Freyja to continue her love of nature. Has many a time been found hugging a tree, playing in the leaves and kissing twigs. Has also been found having a poo in the bushes with me keeping the nettles away from her arse.

- One of my close friend’s weddings. She looked amazing, as did her hub. I wore a dress. A sight for sore eyes, it was.

- A nearby farm to feed the pigs and the llamas. Also spent the afternoon keeping the chickens away from my daughter’s cornetto before she felt the inclination to clobber them with it.

I plan to update my blog more often now; I can’t promise anything because I know what I’m like, but I have been away from the action for far too long and I kinda miss it.